14th March: The day my life change forever

I usually try and come up with a snazzy intro to poignant posts, but I can’t seem to find one for this one.

So I’m going to jump straight in.  Boom.
14th March 2014.  The day my life changed forever…
I woke up at 4am that day, scared, anxious, and tired.  I looked on Twitter and saw that Tom Fletcher from McFly had become a daddy to Buzz, who was born on the 13th March.

I cried.  Not happy tears.  But sad, longing, empty ones.

We had been trying to conceive for three long hard years.  I wanted to be a mummy, more than anything.  The want and need to have a baby had taken over my whole life.  I was an infertile, depressed mess.

I was booked for surgery that day, to investigate my infertility with the potential of a partial or full hysterectomy.

I walked into the hospital scared and infertile.

I walked out shocked and PREGNANT.

How, I hear you ask.  My surgery was abandoned after a pre-op pregnancy test came up positive.

Just a fluke I thought.  Fucking body, conning me again.

Seven tests later.  I was definitely pregnant.

Nope, still a cruel trick I thought.

So the surgeon took me for a scan.  And there in my belly was a little bean.

2014-03-17 19.09.30

Shit the bed.  I really was pregnant and I had no idea.

I was 7 weeks pregnant, and our little jumping bean had a heartbeat.

So for me, the 14th March will always be my favourite most memorable day ever, even more so than the day I gave birth.

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