Do you ever have those days/weeks/months where you feel just a little bit shit?
Not full on depressed; or not even sad. But just a little bit shit.
Let me explain.
Work is hard at the moment; it’s stressful and although I enjoy it, it’s doing my head in.
Parenthood wise my little man is going through a spiteful phase and is being bloody hard work.
I don’t feel terrible but I don’t feel like I’m doing a good job as a Mum. Or as a human being to be honest.
Ah, I don’t like how that sounds – I’m not wallowing in a pity-pool-party. I’m just… a little bit shit.
I’m right slap bang in that slightly-depressed-but-slightly-not-right place.
I’m sleeping okay; my mystery illness is making me so tired I just end up comatose in front of various TV programmes most nights of the week.
Financially we are hard up but I can afford to feed us, so life is all good.
The small one is hard work at the moment but I’m just hoping and praying that it’s a phase and will end soon.
I feel very fat. The waistband of my leggings and trousers has settled into a nice spot which creates the illusion that I have two guts. To be fair it’s no fucking illusion – I’m fat and my tummy was ruined by nine months of carrying a big baby and Polyhydramnios.
And eating shit on a daily basis. I guess that didn’t help.
But I just feel like I’m pootling along. I’m not upset about anything, but I’m not excited or particularly happy about anything.
My willpower for eating right has long-deserted me, I’m hoping it reappears soon.
Anxiety. Let’s talk about that major arsehole. It’s not great at the moment. I’m scared every time I go out in a car as the driver or a passenger. And I also panic about every little detail with regard to the mancub.
So, yeah – this may go down in history as the most B-O-R-I-N-G post ever, but it’s where I’m at right now.
I’m feeling some self-love goals coming on – maybe I need to concentrate on being kind to myself and the weight loss and recovery will come after.
I don’t just yet… but maybe if I try I will?
Have you been here? How did you feel? Is it ok to feel just… a little bit shit?
