6th November 2018
I have neglected you, dear sodding diary, for a while now – it’s been a busy few weeks with lots going on.
The biggest change being that I’ve changed job – it’s a very long story and not one for the public eye but I was sort of forced to leave my previous job and I’ve luckily found another quickly. It’s going really well, it’s totally different to what I’ve done before so all is now well.
Unfortunately my anxiety has other ideas – a combination of stress and anxiety has made me feel pretty low and rubbish and so my first week in my new job has been really tough.
Why? I don’t seem to have any confidence at all in myself – I’m fighting a daily battle with my head, which is telling me I’m rubbish and that I can’t do the job. I’m doing the job, I’m picking it up quite well, however that inner voice is there every bloody second of the day telling me I’m not good enough.
I think the anxiety is exaserbated by the Mirena coil I had fitted four weeks ago when I had my laparoscopy – along with very strange moods and anxiety I’m having migraines daily, which is making me even more miserable.
I can cope with the moods, the cramps, the random spotting, but not daily migraines. Any one who suffers fom migraines and chronic headaches know how debillitating they can be. The tablets I’m prescribed take the severe pain and stop me being sick but I still end up with spotty eyes, a dull ache and nausea for a good few days afterwards.
Not much I can do, mind – I just need to see how it goes and hope they ease soon. Either that or I’ll stab myself in the head.
We went and toured two local primary schools last week – the boy turned four last week and we find ourself very suddenly in the ‘school admissions 2019’ category.
And it’s terrifying – how on earth do you pick a school, when it’s bascially out of your control anyways? More on that in another post…
It’s 4pm and I’ve tidied the house and caught up with some blog work today, I’m feeling okayish and I’ve decided to try and have some me-time this evening. According to a lady at WW this morning audiobooks are the way to go – so my plan is to have a long bubbly bath, a bedtime brew and wind down listening to a book.
That’s the plan, anyways…