I’m still getting used to Twitter, I’m fairly new to it, and I’ll admit I love it, I must have lived in some sort of Twitter-shunning cave for the last few years.
This morning I’ve seen quite a few #thursdaythought posts and there is all sorts from all sorts of people.
This got me thinking about my life, who I am what I am, and all sorts of related deep shit.
Thinking about what I am, first and foremost?
A parent. A mum. That’s what I am.
No, it isn’t who I am in the physical or emotional sense, it doesn’t define me, but it’s my main job and my life. That little smelly fartbox is the love of my life and he needs me for everything.
Simply put, being a parent is simple. Keep your child happy, healthy and loved. Boom.
Reality? It’s very fucking hard.
Those days where you feel like shit on a stick and you hurt so much you can’t move?
Tough. You cook, clean, play trains and generally wing it whilst pondering how bad you actually feel.
Those days where you dress your child in their smartest bestest outfit, and yourself too?
Poo explosion. Shit of mass destruction. Your clothes and theres are covered.
At the moment we are right slap bang in the Terrible Twos, aka ACTUAL LIVING HELL.
Don’t get me wrong, when the kid is asleep or sweet for two minutes and I go all soppy and doe-eyed and forget how awful he can be, but holy fanny flaps he is vile at the moment.
We have a dividing wall between the kitchen and front room, and this morning he just keeps banging it. It’s like Chinese torture. How I haven’t lost my shit yet I don’t know.
He just will not listen, everything is a tantrum or a no.
And that’s parenthood. You constantly feel like despite giving your best you haven’t done enough. Doesn’t matter what you do, it’s never enough.
It’s hard to remember that these little people we create are simply moulded by us, and we can’t be responsible for everything they do, they grow and learn all the time and have their own personalities built in.
Am I a good parent? Who knows.
But I rock the SHIT out of being the best parent I can be.